🌱 Learning to Feel Again: How IFS & Bloom Are Guiding Me Through Anxiety

Lately, I’ve been feeling more anxious than usual—and that surprised me, because I’ve never identified as an anxious person. But when I dropped my long-standing coping mechanism—my disordered eating—I suddenly lost the shield that kept strong emotions at bay. Without that crutch, I’m left with my feelings. I’m learning, for the first time, how to feel them—and to work through them.

Enter Internal Family Systems (IFS)—a therapeutic model I recently discovered. IFS invites us to see our mind as a family of parts—each with its own age, role, and emotional history—and to connect with our core Self. Suddenly, moments of overwhelm weren't just “me spiraling”: they were younger parts of me hurting, asking for attention, safety, or direction.

What Is IFS?

IFS was developed in the 1980s by Dr. Richard C. Schwartz. He observed that people’s minds hold different sub-personalities—like an internal family—each with unique roles and intentions Broadly, it identifies three types of parts:

1. Exiles – Carry wounds, often from childhood.

2. Managers – Try to prevent pain from surfacing.

3. Firefighters – Swoop in when exiles break through, often using impulsive coping.

IFS doesn’t treat these parts—it sees them as protecting us, often in extreme ways. Healing begins when we befriend each part, understand their origins, and release the burdens they carry.

A Brief History & Evidence Base

IFS emerged as a synthesis of systems thinking, ego-state therapy, and family therapy. Initially used with eating-disorder clients, it’s grown into a widely respected evidence-based model.

Its effectiveness is well-documented:

• A study with college women found IFS as effective as CBT or IPT in reducing depressive symptoms IFS Institute+14PubMed+14Therapy Utah -+14.

• Research with rheumatoid arthritis patients showed marked drops in depression, anxiety, and physical pain Society for Psychotherapy+2IFS Institute+2Taylor & Francis Online+2.

• PTSD and trauma studies show significant symptom reduction, especially among those with complex childhood trauma histories foundationifs.org.

• Anxiety-focused investigations indicate IFS helps people feel more empowered and less controlled by fearful parts seachangepsychotherapy.com+1Verywell Mind+1.

Real-world therapists call it “a powerfully transformative, non-pathologizing, evidence‑based model” Akjournals+5Australian Psychological Society+5Verywell Mind+5, though some caution it’s best used alongside other modalities and under trained guidance.

How IFS Helps Me—and Ties Into Bloom

Working through Bloom—my personal journaling book—I’m gently guided to notice and unpack different parts of myself. IFS enriches that process. As I write, I’m often listening for younger versions of me that pop up—sometimes 8, sometimes 15—reacting to adulthood stressors. I pause, ask, What do you need?, and patiently wait for what comes up. It might be reassurance, creative space, gentle movement, or even simple acknowledgment.

Meeting these parts, honoring their ages, and offering them a seat at my internal table has been quietly powerful. It’s been less about “fixing” anxiety and more about giving space to voices that have been waiting a long time to be heard.

Why It Matters

• Self-compassion: Studies show IFS increases self-compassion, which is deeply healing when anxiety feels shame-based Taylor & Francis Onlineseachangepsychotherapy.com.

• Empowerment: IFS shifts you from “I’m my anxiety” to “I have anxious parts—and I can talk to them” seachangepsychotherapy.com.

• Safety: Because protectors must allow access to exiles, the process feels gentle and paced—no forced dives into trauma.

• Insight: Identifying protective parts shows us how we’ve adapted—and where there’s room for new patterns.

The Journey Ahead

This path hasn’t been easy. Journaling with Bloom and working with IFS invites vulnerability and reflection—sometimes fatigue or discomfort. But each time I pause to meet a part of me—fearful, protective, young—I feel a subtle shift. Trust builds, not all at once, but moment by moment. I know I’m growing stronger not by pushing harder, but by listening deeper.